I am not the same person I was last year at this time. There is no way that I could be, honestly. This past year has made me stronger. There were times when I was weak, but I was accepted by my friends, even when I was weak. I found out who my true friends and loved ones were during my times of weakness.
I am now strong, yet again. But I now know that it is okay to be weak. I am, after all, only human. (probably : )
For 2004, I want to continue being a good mother for my son. I will put his needs first when I can and when necessary. As life with his Daddy changes, I feel that I will become a larger part of my son’s life, and I will be ready for that no matter what! fenris is really good with my son, and I feel that we can provide my son a second family, so instead of just one broken family, My son will have fenris and I. Hopefully, the family that my ex is creating will also be a strong unit, but that yet remains to be seen. I hope, for 2004, that I can be more accepting of my ex and Tracy and that we can continue having a pleasant relationship for my son’s sake.
My relationship with fenris is another aspect that I look forward to for 2004. It has grown tremendously in the past couple months, and I see that only improving as we continue to love and to learn together as well as lean on each other when it is necessary. fenris is a source of joy, love, sanity and comfort for me and I believe that I have become the same for him.
A new career is also in its infancy for me. In 2004 I hope to continue my education and now that I am starting a new job as an intern for a web design company, I feel that my life now has another layer of possibilities that were never recognized before. I am excited about the possibilities, and fenris is already speaking of how we could be a packaged deal and apply to companies together. The doors are opening for us everywhere and it makes my heart burst with elation and excitement.
Friends. This is an aspect that I need to work on closely. As I have developed my relationship with fenris, some of my friendships have suffered. (I believe this is true at the beginning of many new relationships. You only want to be with your significant other and friends sometimes are left out.) I am enthusiastic that fenris and I can make friends that can come over and have enjoyable afternoons and/or evenings here. That way I can have my son tucked safe and sound into his own bed by his regular bedtime of 7 pm. Also, we can play games, watch movies or just talk into the wee hours without worrying about having to wake up my son to leave.
It is my goal, my resolution, to improve communication with my old friends, and to attempt to make new friends that have similar interests and are in similar situations. It is always good to have friends that are a family unit, when you are a part of a family unit. It isn’t always easy to find a couple with children who is compatible with everyone, but it is my goal to find such a family that fenris and I can spend time with in addition to our friends who are not familial units.
That was the resolution I sent to everyone. For my BOS, I’m going to add one more thing…