• Mon. Sep 25th, 2023

Thoughts on previous entry.. (multidimensional selves)

Jun 13, 2006

Ya know, it’s weird but it makes sense too. I have often noticed how I am a different person at work, around my parents, around my son, with my friends, etc. I find it sad that I never thought about it as being multidimensional.

 I can accept that no one part should be left out. There are times when you have to behave a certain way, but I have always thought it should be balanced by times when you can just let yourself go.

 I found that I was able to truly be myself when I went to the HSF this year. No expectations, no requirements, no predetermined ideas or images or thoughts from other people or even myself. It was wonderful. I was able to do a lot of soul searching and it was gooooooood. :)

 Since then, my reality has become lodged in-between my work self and my mother self. There has been not much else. I’ve been so tired, but perhaps it isn’t just a physical tiredness, perhaps I am tired because I am repressing my own true self.  I hope that I can take some time, soon and just be me. Otherwise, it’s gonna be a long goddamn summer.. *sigh* (which it is anyway, cuz I hate the heat. The only thing summer is good for is my long / extended visitation with my son!)

 Oh, and I like the comment the article makes about journaling. I enjoy writing because it is a form of release as well as a means to put my thoughts into a reasonable pattern. (which doesn’t always work, but is a good theory). I can look back and see exactly what I was thinking at the time and perhaps even remember what I was feeling. Plus. It’s fun!


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