Over the summer, I experienced some “bullying” that I recognized but was uncertain about. I asked a woman’s support group this:
Does anyone else get the whole
“don’t take it personally”
“trust but verify”
“stop being emotional”
“You are being too sensitive”
lines?
For example, yesterday I had mentioned I needed a zipfile for a handover of code in addition to Github. There are files that Github does not store, so I needed the whole package.
My manager questioned why I needed that zipfile during the meeting and that made me “take it personally” and that my requirements were dismissive and unnecessary.
At that same meeting, my part of the project went from the sole person doing it to “DP, who will probably do the more of the back end where KB will be more front end focused on the UI improvements”
I heard that as
DP will be doing the back end and KB will be doing the front end
which is not my responsibility at all. I will be doing front AND back end and DP will be doing data engineering which is definitely not how it came across.Am I being too much of a girl and too emotional?
I hate that I get dismissed and shouldn’t feel.
I hate that I never know if what I’m feeling is legitimate or if no one else is even noticing. Why are girls built so differently than guys??
LOL and *sigh*Insights requested!
*huggles*
I was told “you are NOT being “too much of a girl and too emotional”. Please don’t buy into the trope. The feelings you describe are valid and know that you are not experiencing them in a vacuum.”
Then today, an old article came across my feed:
Workplace Bullying: Types, Intervention, Prevention | Psychology Today
So I googled
https://psyche.co/guides/how-to-respond-and-seek-help-when-youre-bullied-at-work
When Work Hurts — Jonas Altman
I will learn how to handle this is if it happens again in the future.
I will be heard.
I will not be bullied.