• Wed. Jun 12th, 2024

Summing up the past 4 months

Apr 10, 2020

What’s been going on these first 4 months of 2020?

Kobe Bryant dies in a helicopter crash. Half the world is devastated, the other half just makes dank ass memes. Then some dude in China eats a raw ass bat and starts a global pandemic that specifically kills maw maws and paw paws. Everyone loses their minds. 40% of the population thinks it’s the end of the world, another 40% thinks it’s all fake, and 20% blames the whole thing on cell phone towers and pedophiles. The one thing everyone seems to agree on is that the only way to survive is by hoarding toilet paper. Grocery stores are ransacked and Charmin ultra soft essentially replaces the dollar as the official U.S. currency. As hysteria grows, world governments are forced to shut the entire planet down and lock everyone in their houses and the only person that can keep the people from completely flipping out and starting a huge riot is a gun toting Oklahoma meth head with 180 pet tigers…
Can’t make this shit up.

(Author unknown but all facts.. well, except the bit about the meth head, I haven’t watched the movie yet and have no desire to…)


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