• Sat. Nov 2nd, 2024

Our Handfasting Ritual

with images:
https://em.flinthillspagans.org/kris-and-johns-handfasting

Creating Sacred Space

EAST (Disa): Guardian of the East, of Air, I summon your presence, that you may weave tightly the bonds of Heart, Spirit, and Love between these two. Let none undo the fabric of their love.

SOUTH (MamaCat): Guardian of the South, of Fire, I summon your presence, that you may ignite the passion and love for this blessed pair… ever burning yet never one consuming the other.

WEST (SummerWolf): Guardian of the West, of Water, I summon your presence, that you may bless this couple with a love as deep as any ocean and many kisses in the rain.

NORTH (Corkyy): Guardian of Earth, I summon your presence, that you may bless this man and this lady with thy strength and wisdom.

ALL FOUR TOGETHER: Gracious Lady, Gentle Lord, grant this blessed pair thy love and protection. Blessed be!

Toke:
We gather here this midday to bind together this man and woman in a ritual of love. Let all who stand within this circle be here of their own free will and accord in peace and love. We charge this Circle to be filled with love. May this sacred space be consecrated before the Gods and Goddesses and may it be a Guardian and Protection for the work we do this day. Let John and Kris stand here before us and in the Presence of the Ancient Ones

EXPRESSION OF INTENT:

Toke:
Kris, do you choose John to be your life companion, to share openly with him, to speak truthfully and lovingly to him, to accept him fully as he is and delight in who he is becoming, to respect his uniqueness and compassionately encourage and support him through all of the changes of your years together?
Kris: I do

Toke:
John, do you choose Kris to be your life companion, to share openly with her, to speak truthfully and lovingly to her, to accept her fully as she is and delight in who she is becoming, to respect her uniqueness and compassionately encourage and support her through all of the changes of your years together?
John: I do

Toke:
Having expressed your intentions, may the light of love, respect and understanding shine eternally for you.

Toke:
Love is a friendship that has caught fire. It is the quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses. Love is content with the present, it hopes for the future but does not brood over the past. It is the day in day out chronicle of irritations, problems, compromises, small disappointments, big victories and working toward common goals. If you have love in your life, it can make up for many things that you lack. If you do not have love, no matter what else there is, it isn’t enough.

BLESSING OF THE RINGS

Toke:
All things in Nature are circular – night becomes day, day becomes night and night becomes day again. The moon waxes and wanes and waxes again. There is Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter and then the Spring returns. These things are part of the Great Mysteries. Kevin, do you bring the symbols of these Great Mysteries of Life?

Kevin gives Toke the rings.

Toke:
By Air, by Fire, by Water, and by Earth do I bless and consecrate these rings.

These rings, a token of your love for one another, serve as a reminder that all in life is a cycle; all comes to pass and passes away and comes to pass again.

May the element of Air bless these rings. Air is at the beginning of all things, the direction of East, and the dawning of a new day. May your lives through the reminder of this ring be blessed with continuing renewal of love. (Waves rings through incense smoke)

May the element of Fire bless these rings. Fire is the passion within your love, the spark of love itself, the heat of anger, and the warmth of compassion. It is the direction of South, the heat of midday. May your lives through the reminder of this ring be blessed with continual warmth. (Passes the rings through flame)

May the element of Water bless these rings. Water nourishes and replenishes us, the waters of emotion and harmony pour vitality into our lives. It is the direction of West, the afternoon and evening. May your lives through the reminder of this ring be blessed with fulfillment and contentment. (Submerges the rings in water)

May the element of Earth bless these rings. All life springs from the earth and returns to the earth, the direction of North, the nighttime. May your lives through the reminder of this ring be blessed with strength and solidity. (Touches the rings to earth or a stone)

May the Lord and Lady bless these rings, the symbol of union, with happiness, wholeness, and love.

EXCHANGE OF THE RINGS

Toke holds up the wand with the rings upon it.

Toke:
Place your right hands Over this wand and your rings – his hand over hers.

Below you are the stones
As time does pass
Remember,
Like a star should your love be constant
Like a stone should your love be firm
Be close, but not too close
Possess one another, but be understanding
Have patience each with the other
For storms will come, but they will go quickly
Be free in the giving of affection and warmth
Make love often, and be sensuous with one another
Have no fear and let not the ways or words
Of the unenlightened give you unease.
For the Goddess and the God are with you,
Now and Always.

Toke: “John Repeat after me”
John:
By seed and root, by bud and stem, by leaf and flower and fruit, by life and love, by the God and the Goddess and in the presence of these witnesses, I, John, take thee, Kris, to my hand, my heart, and my spirit. Death shall not part us; for in the fullness of time we shall be born again at the same time and in the same place as each other; and we shall meet, and know, and remember, and love again.
John places the ring on Kris’ finger

Toke says “Kris Repeat after me”
Kris:
By seed and root, by bud and stem, by leaf and flower and fruit, by life and love, by the God and the Goddess and in the presence of these witnesses, I, Kris, take thee, John, to my hand, my heart, and my spirit. Death shall not part us; for in the fullness of time we shall be born again at the same time and in the same place as each other; and we shall meet, and know, and remember, and love again.
Kris places the ring on John’s finger.

Kris and John Together:
From this time on, I’ll be your lover and your friend,
Your confident and your comforter,
What load you carry, that load too will I carry
What need is yours shall be my need
For you I will open my hidden places that your sun may shine upon them
I will be your mate sharing cakes and mead with you
And at the closing of the day your body will be my sleeping place, your arms my blanket.

Toke:
These promises you make by the Sun and the Moon, by fire and water, by day and night, by land and sea. With these vows you swear, by the Goddess and the God, to be full partners, each to the other. If one drops the load, the other will pick it up. If one is a discredit to the other, that person’s own honor will be forfeit, generation upon generation, until they repair that which was damaged and find that which was lost. Should you fail to keep the oaths you pledge today, the Elements themselves will reach out and destroy you.

BINDING

Toke then takes the cord and wraps around one persons left hand and the other persons right. As he does so he explains the significance of the colors selected by
the couple.

Toke:
Blue is the color of communication, contentedness, harmony, patience, spiritual development, self expression and eternity.

Silver is the color of intuition, truth, enlightenment, protection, inspiration. Silver also represents the moon.

Black is the color of possibilities, anticipation, strength, empowerment and wisdom. Black is also chosen to honor the dead on this day of Samhain.

Toke:
With this cord, I bind you to the vows that you each have made. May the Lord and the Lady smile upon this union and bless this couple with health and prosperity. For remember what one may not provide, the other may. So are you bound, in the light of the Lord and Lady, each to the other, unto all of your days.

Kris and John Read the following together:
You cannot possess me, for I belong to myself. But while we both wish it, I give you that which is mine to give.
You cannot command me, for I am a free person. But I shall serve you in those ways you require, and the honeycomb will taste sweeter coming from my hand.
I pledge to you that yours will be the name I cry aloud in the night, and the eyes into which I smile in the morning.
I pledge to you my living and my dying, each equally in your care. I shall be a shield for your back, and you for mine. I shall not slander you, nor you me. I shall honor you above all others, and when we quarrel, we shall do so in private, and tell no strangers our grievances.
This is the marriage of equals.
Heart to thee, Soul to thee, Body to thee, Forever and always, So mote it be.

BLESSINGS

Toke:
Turns to the East: Blessed be by the element of air. May you be blessed with communication, intellectual growth, and wisdom.

Turns to the South: Blessed be by the element of fire. May you be blessed with harmony, vitality, creativity, and passion.

Turns to the West: Blessed be by the element of water. May you be blessed with friendship, intuition, caring, understanding, and love.

Turns to the North: Blessed be by the element of earth. May you be blessed with tenderness, happiness, compassion, and sensuality.

May the Winds of communication blow ever between you; may the Fires of love sustain you; may the Waters of life heal and soothe you; and may the strength of the Earth bind and steady you throughout your time together.

Lord and Lady, in Your sight have these people promised themselves to one another, made vows before You and these people. Bless them in their new life together.

As the Air you breathe brings you life, may you always speak truthfully to one another. For truly does each falsehood act as a little death.

As the Fire of love burns within you, may you always find a spark even in your anger. For without Love, we are but weak shadows upon the stones.

As the Waters of life flow within your bodies, may your personal tides move in unison, and your emotions flow. For Water contains life, sustains life, and without it we are but dry husks.

As the Earth grounds and steadies you, may you always remain strong for one another. For strength adds to strength and builds upon itself.

All this do I charge you, for as long as Love shall last.
May the God and Goddess bless this union. May all who encounter it be blessed with love. May your lives be full and your hurts be few. So Mote It Be.
By the grace of the Lord and Lady has your love, through Their love, brought you together upon this day. May the Gods sustain and strengthen your bond, bless you and keep you, for as long as love shall last.

By the Winds that bring change, by the Fire of love, by the Seas of fortune and the strength of the Earth do I bless this union.

SHARED MEAL (CAKES AND MEAD)

Toke:
As the seed is to the soil, and the fuel is to the fire, so is the blade to the chalice — partners in growth and nourishment. May we, by the blessing of this food and drink, nourish all with our love.

We give thanks to the planters of seeds, workers of the soil, and harvesters of grain for these cakes that we now share. Their efforts, through the grace of our Mother Earth, sustain us. May all be blessed by the sharing of their gifts.

We give thanks to the workers of vines and bees, harvesters of fruits and honey, and makers of wine and mead for this drink that we now share. Their efforts, through the grace of our Mother Earth, sustain us. May all be blessed by the sharing of their gifts.

Lord and Lady, bless these cakes, that they may nourish our bodies and feed our souls. (Share Cakes)

Lord and Lady, bless this drink, that none may thirst within our sight. (Share mead)

Let us always remember to share all that we have with those who have nothing.

May you never hunger. (Melissa Takes Cakes around.)

(Kevin takes cups around)
May you never thirst. (Ray Takes mead or wine around).

Release the Circle

East: Thank you, guardian of East, of air. Your gentle loving whisper will breathe new life every day into this newly handfasted couple. Go if thou must, stay if thou wilt and know thou are always welcome. Blessed Be.

South: Thank you, guardian of South, of fire. Your everlasting passion is infused in this newly handfasted couple forevermore. Go if thou must, stay if thou wilt and know thou are always welcome. Blessed Be.

West: Thank you, guardian of West, of water. Your loving emotions flows deep in the souls of this newly handfasted couple. Go if thou must, stay if thou wilt and know thou are always welcome. Blessed Be.

North: Thank you, guardian of North, of earth. Your solid foundation and security is only the beginning for this newly handfasted couple. Go if thou must, stay if thou wilt and know thou are always welcome. Blessed Be.

Toke: We have thanked the God and Goddess and dismissed the guardians, but the exchange that has happened here today will never be forgotten by them or us. It is nothing less than magical. The circle is released but never broken. Merry Meet, Merry Part and Merry Meet again. Blessed Be!!

The Lord may now kiss the Lady. :)

The Jump

As the couple leaves the circle, the couple jumps over a sword and broom while holding hands. The sword is symbolic of cutting ties with the old life, before they were together, and the broom represents the remnants being swept away.

Em

I'm Me!

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